Cleveland Horseshoe Casino review from an avid slots player

As a prelude to this article, I'm an avid slots player, having played just about every type of slot machine there is, in multiple denominations, in 4 countries and over 2 continents. I've played enough to recognize when games have fair payouts or are a ripoff, and have had my fair share of both wins and losses. This review is based on my visit to the casino on Wednesday, 2.5 days after the grand opening. Now onto the good stuff. PARKING: Parking at the new Horseshoe Casino is confusing, at best. Being in an old department store smack on the corner of Public Square, the casino has no ample parking lot of its own. On the Horseshoe website, they've indicated several nearby lots where it will be free to park *if* you are a Total Rewards member that plays 15 tier credits and plays for 30 minutes. Seems easy enough. I checked the website to decide which lot would be most accessible, and chose the West 3rd and Prospect lot. I get to the area that seems to be the lot and asked the attendant. He indicated the lot across West 3rd was the official lot, so I left that lot and headed to the other. Oops, can't get in -- they're working on the railroad-style barricades and there seems to be no way in. I drove around the block to look for another entrance, entering what appeared to be the back of the same lot. Nope, different operation with no attendant. I left and decided to head to the old garage area connected to Tower city, following the huge CASINO PARKING sign. I drive through the garage and parked outside, for ease of finding the car later. Guess what? This lot won't validate, as it's not an official Horseshoe lot. NOTE: MANY of the parking lots now say "casino parking" but don't validate. Only the ones labeled "Horseshoe Casino" will. After 4 hrs in the lot, it cost me $9. THE LINE: I entered through Tower City to find a somewhat long line at 4pm. It took an hour to get in, and I was surprised the place was nearly empty. It looked like Vegas at 4 am-noon. The line seems to have been there simply for hype. Oddly enough, when I left at around 8 pm, the place was packed and there was no line at all. Very odd. THE GAMES: As would be expected, this brand new casino has all brand new games. There are plenty of one-armed bandit style slots, but new ones made to play like the old style. The first playing level of the casino seems full of these. I played for a while on this level on some video slots and the money left my hands almost as quickly as flushing it down the toilet. I decided to venture up to the next level, where the high limits room and food court are. I saw someone winning a decent amount on one of those stacked wild slots, so played another near them. Gameplay was getting better. This machine had a 40-cent minimum bet (penny slot.) Eventually I found some others I hadn't seen in other casinos and ended up ahead for the night. As for types of slots, there were many games I didn't recognize, and I play often -- I was in Vegas in the past two months, even, and also at Presque Isle a couple times. There were also some of the classic video slots such as Cleopatra and Pompeii (old favorite). There were penny slots, loads of 2cent ones, nickels, dimes, quarters, on up to a $500 machine in the high limits room. (Most machines in high limits are the reel style rather than video slots.) Progressives: Many of the machines, especially the 2-cent slots, had minor progressives connected to gameplay. Some of them had a minor progressive payout set at only $5, which seems hardly worth it, as everyone surely spends far more than that to win the progressive. The highest level progressives (on 1 or 2 cent slots with max bet around $1.50-$3) were usually in the $1k-$2k range -- not that great, but it's something. I didn't see any of the massive progressive jackpot games, but then again, wasn't looking for those. I was mostly scoping the place out and testing gameplay. Other Notes: There's a tiny food court on the next gaming level (floor 3) that has 3, maybe 4 restaurants. One of them sells bratwursts and fried bologna, lol. This is near the high limit room. - ALL of the ticket redemption/bill breaker machines went down at the same time, meaning a visit to the cashier was needed for even minor banking. You'd think these would be connected to multiple servers rather than one. Maybe they will be in the future. (they were working fine when I first got there.) - The top floor of the casino is the poker area; it looked pretty fun for players and there was a bit of a wait for a spot at a table. - the vibe is pretty decent in the casino (the 2nd gaming level moreso than the 1st). There's a bar area with chairs to lounge around in on the slots floor, and some decent modern pop/r&b pumping through the speakers. That area was fun and actually felt a bit like Vegas -- much moreso than the other 2 gaming floors. -- Air conditioning works well within the casino, but seemed non-existent in the Tower City hallway leading up to the entrance. That hallway still has the rundown Tower City vibe to it, even though it has been dressed up just a little. All in all, the casino was fun and I'll be back. It's nice to see a bit of excitement and finally, some people! in the downtown area. Have fun!